How Do You Deal With Pain?
As many of you might have guessed, I have been on a bit of a blogging hiatus. The holidays came and went with a bit of stress. Birthdays and job promotions were celebrated. Work has also given me so much to be gratefulfor. And as always, with more work, comes a little less free time to sit down and write.
I would also like to say a quick “hello” and “welcome” to all my new readers and subscribers. As well as a big hug to all my wonderful long time supporters. Without all of you, this blog would only be a quiet thought in the back of my mind.
Many years ago I was involved in a terrible car accident. Luckily, I emerged without a scratch, but I did inherit a sometimes wonky neck. Let me elaborate: when shit hits the fan and I get stressed, and I mean SUPER DUPER STRESSED, my trapezius muscles can spasm, leaving me with a shooting pain down my arms and neck. This pain occurs maybe once a year, so it’s not a frequent friend in my life. I should also note, that exercise and regular stretching has made it much easier for me to deal with any flare ups.
I bring up this old injury because it decided to flare up today. As I sat around my house trying to stretch the muscle groups and break up the spasms with ice, I noticed that all that I could think about was where I hurt, how this pain was ruining my day, how I hated life, etc. And then after that pity party, I’d get upset at myself for even complaining because there are so many more people in the world who are suffering way more than I am and that I should shut my whiny little mouth … and then the spasms would flare up and then I’d start swearing again. Not a very positive cycle of thinking.
Part of me resented my body. Part of me couldn’t take the pain. Part of me resented my mind for being such a baby. But the best part of me decided to dig down into the injury and see what triggered it. I was fine last night. I had been active and in good health for the past year. What in heaven’s name triggered it?
Was it work? Maybe.
Was it family? Perhaps.
Was it related to money? Could be.
Was it my old nemesis control? *cue pain spasm* Oh f•ck. Yup. That’s it.
I don’t know about you, but when I lose/don’t have control over a situation, my body sometimes translates that loss of control into tension. And then guess what happens when I hold onto months worth of tension? Painful times.
So now what? I know that all I can do is keep on trucking. To learn to accept that I can still live a thriving life even when I lose control. To recognize the tension in my body and slowly breathe love into the areas that need healing. I know that part of my journey in this lifetime is to learn how to live with and without control and to learn to be grateful for these moments of clarity in my life.
Hope you’re having a wonderful start of the week!
